Why Humility Is So Hard

Reflections on 1 Peter 5:6–7

Humility may be one of the hardest Christian virtues to practice.

We know it’s important. We preach and teach our kids about it. We tell ourselves to stay humble. And yet—when real situations press into our lives—humility suddenly becomes very challenging.

In this article, let me give three examples:

When your Great Idea is Rejected

If you’ve ever been in ministry, you know how quickly pride can rise up in everyday moments.

Picture this: your church has a ministry need but lacks the financial resources to carry it out. Suppose you have a degree in business, and you’ve put together a solid fundraising idea, prayed over it, prepared well—and then your leadership shuts it down.

If they explain their reasoning and you agree with it, submission would be easy.  But humility isn’t tested when we agree.  Humility is tested when we disagree and must submit anyway.

That’s when pride whispers:  “Why don’t they listen? My idea is better.”

Humility suddenly becomes difficult.

When the Promotion Goes to Someone Else

Or maybe you are anticipating a promotion at work.  You have been waiting for an opportunity to step into greater responsibility. The timing seems right. Your know you are the perfect candidate.

But the promotion goes to someone far less qualified.

You know you should “submit to one another,” but in that moment, humility feels like swallowing sand.

When Admitting You’re Wrong Feels Impossible

And sometimes the struggle happens at home.  After a long exhausting day, your patience snaps. You become angry at your son, say things you shouldn’t, and deep down you know: I need to apologize.

But apologizing to someone under your own care—especially your child—can feel even harder than submitting to a leader.

Again, humility resists us.

Humility is difficult for a deeper reason—one that goes all the way back to the Garden of Eden, where Adam and Eve chose to trust in themselves and to define good and evil on their own terms instead of trusting God for that wisdom. Since that moment, sin has corrupted the human heart with a relentless desire to elevate ourselves—over God and over one another. This impulse is universal. It lives in every person. And whenever humility is required of us, that ancient desire for self-exaltation rises in protest. That is why humility does not come naturally; it must be learned in the presence of God.

In this article, we will reflect on Peter's encouragement to the church leader to take care of the flock, and to the younger people to submit to their leaders.  He expands the idea from there to encourage everyone to submit to one another.

Before Peter wrote this letter, he famously argued with the other disciples about who was the greatest. He understood pride, comparison, and the desire for recognition.  Yet decades later, Peter writes to believers scattered across the Roman Empire—people suffering persecution and hardship—and he calls them to submit to one another and to humble themselves under God.

Why?

Because, he says:

“God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.”
—1 Peter 5:5

And this leads to one of the most important attitude to overcome pride against one another.

Pride against one another is pride against God.  So humble yourselves first before God—because He is mighty, He is wise, and He cares for you— then watch how humility flows out of that position toward one another.

Let’s look at how Peter builds this truth.

Pride against One Another is a Pride against God

Notice that Peter begins this verse with the word “Therefore.” Just before this, he was talking about submitting to one another. Here, he transitions into an encouragement to submit ourselves under God. These two relationships are far more interconnected than we often realize.

Just as we cannot love our neighbor as ourselves without first loving God with all our heart, we cannot truly submit to one another unless we first submit to God.

We may try, but our efforts will not endure in every situation. At some point, our own strength will fail. We must first submit to God.

But how exactly are these two ideas connected? What does a church ministry needing funding—and my fundraising idea being rejected—have to do with my humility toward God? It has everything to do with it. We simply need to trace that connection.

Every human interaction and every event in our lives has a spiritual dimension behind it. When we reflect on this, we begin to see that my church is also God’s church, and He loves her deeply. If God wants the church to carry out a particular ministry, He will surely provide a way to fund it. His way will always be far better than mine, and I should place my trust in Him. And if the funding never comes, I can rest in His will, trusting that perhaps He did not want the church to pursue that ministry after all.

This attitude shifts our focus from our fundraising plans to God Himself. When we stop centering our thoughts on ourselves and turn our attention toward God, we begin to see things more clearly. This clarity reveals the reality that frees us from pride and enables us to be humble toward one another.

Reasons to humble under God

Now, we can find many reasons why we should humble ourselves under God.  In this passage, Peter gives us three helpful reasons: God is mighty, God is wise and He cares for you.

God Is Mighty

Peter writes:

“Humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God…”
—1 Peter 5:6

This “mighty hand” is the hand that rescued Israel from Egypt, parted the sea, and led His people out of slavery into the new creation as they walked through dry land. It is also the hand that raised Jesus from the dead. That very same hand is the one that guides us and brings power into our lives today.

If God can raise Christ, He can handle the finances of your church and your family. If God delivered Israel, He can lead your ministry. If God holds the universe, surely He can meet every needs in your life.

Unfortunately, we often miss out on experiencing God’s mighty hand. When we cling to control and insist on forcing things to go our way, God often waits for our repentance. At times, He may even nudge us through trials and hardship to bring us to a place of surrender. He is inviting us to release control to Him. And when we do, He often brings deliverance through His mighty hand.

Peter uses the phrase “casting all your anxiety on Him” to describe this surrender. This anxiety is not referring to a clinical condition of anxiety or depression; the word carries a broader sense—our thoughts, our concerns, our worries, and our desires. Cast them all upon God, and experience His mighty hand. Don’t miss out on that opportunity.

God Is Wise

Peter continues:

“…that He may exalt you at the proper time.”
—1 Peter 5:6

If there’s a proper time, then there must also be improper times.  Good things that come at a wrong time can hurt us rather than help us.  Good thing at a wrong time is not necessarily a good thing.  

Perhaps that promotion opportunity, entrance into a top ivy league university or getting into a new lucrative business venture, may not be at the right time, and they may not be good for us.  Perhaps it will actually draw us away from God, or God may have something better waiting for us later.  Maybe we are not ready for that work after all.  God often withholds something not because He’s punishing us, but because He’s protecting us—from pride, from self-destruction, from moving too fast.

The true and honorable exaltation that comes at the proper time may not even occur in this lifetime. You may know a humble Christian who served God faithfully all his life, yet earthly exaltation never came. But know this: God’s promises never fail. That person will indeed be exalted in eternity for the service he rendered to the Lord. Such honor will be far beyond any earthly exaltation he might have received in this life.

Look at Jesus as the ultimate example. His earthly ministry ended on a shameful cross; yet the shame He endured became the path to eternal glory. He is now seated at the right hand of God, inviting us to follow in His footsteps. Such a life requires faith—faith that rests in God’s unseen promises and trusts His timing above our own.

God Cares for You

His mighty hand and unfathomable wisdom mean nothing if He does not care about you. But the truth is that God loves you. Not only does He know the best thing for you, the best way to bring it about, and the best timing to deliver it, He also has your best interest at heart. He loves you deeply and desires what is best for you. If God did not spare His own Son but delivered Him up for us all, surely He will not withhold any good thing from you (Rom 8:32).

So let us humble ourselves under the God who loves us, and receive His love fully, so that we no longer need to seek love or validation from anywhere else.

Recall the story of the father who found it difficult to apologize to his son. The world teaches us that we must appear strong in order to maintain authority and respect—that strength is required to be accepted and loved. But we are already loved by God. When we fully receive that love, we discover that we no longer need to appear strong. We can be honest with ourselves and with one another. Secure in His love, we can be weak, admit our failures, and ask for forgiveness.

In the kingdom of God, dominion and leadership do not depend on lordship or authoritative position. True authority flows from the love we have for one another (Mar 10:35-45).

So what situation are you facing today that makes it difficult to submit to one another? Remember that pride toward one another is ultimately pride toward God. Look for the connection between your struggle and the way God is working in that circumstance. Pray about it. Meditate on it until you see that connection clearly. Then submit yourself under God. He is mighty, He is wise, and He cares for you.

And when you do, watch how your renewed heart begins to express humility toward others—not by your own willpower, but naturally, through the renewal of your mind by the power of God.